There have been several times I have sat down to write this and for one reason or another I found something else to do. How do you sum up the life of one who brought you into this world, let alone tell the tale of their final chapter? As has been said, this particular sad tale was inevitable, but I had hoped it would be a bit further on. I had hoped to share more of my accomplishments and milestones with my mother who was always so proud and protective. The lament of mortal man, always wanting more time.
Without going into detail, mom never had it easy and always had to
fight adversity yet there were true "golden times" where things came
together. It is with moistened eyes and a smile I read the torrent of
cards, letters, and emails, as well as field phone calls from old
family friends who call to remember her. They all remember her
infectious smile, sense of humor, grace and beauty. To quote a dear
friend and loved-one from high school that, only days prior, had
located me after many years: "I remember her as a red-headed ball of
fire, much like you. I remember the travel agency she had in McCall.
I'm so sorry..."
How lucky was I to have a mom who touched so many people, and that was even remembered by one of my classmates and close friends more than 20 years after graduation?
Packing up her apartment and going through boxes of her memories held many bitter-sweet moments for my siblings and me. We found boxes containing photos of her as a baby and little girl, later a young woman and finally a mother. Letters and scrapbooks with all the "goings on" of the time. A folded newspaper front page from Shreveport, Louisiana, proclaiming that "GERMANY QUITS", the announcement of V-E Day.
Many personal treasures and mementos were there as well. It seemed she kept everything, even the letter I wrote to the Easter Bunny as a small child. The hard question, what to keep, what to let pass into the mists of history. One treasure my sister found was a letter written to me by my Great Grandfather the day I was born. I had never seen it until that day sitting on the floor slowly going through mom's things. Talk about goose bumps.
The packing took place over several days, my sister and I generally working 4-6 hours at a time with my brother helping to organize.
A strange blessing in all this was the time that I was able to have with both my sister and brother, whom we had not been together since my wedding, then only briefly, and before that, hardly since I graduated college. We resolved to make sure and spend more time together as a family, a tough thing with us on opposite sides of the country.
The three of us faced the challenges of making mom's final arrangements which were simple in nature. Mom was cremated and plans are underway to scatter her ashes at sea with the assistance of several of her dear friends and loved ones from the Del Rey Yacht Club where she worked more than 17 years. I think it only fitting that they are included in her final sending.
On Sunday, July 20th, we hosted an open house BBQ, food, and drink fest to celebrate mom's life. As for the "New Orleans Jazz Funeral" she wanted, iTunes came to the rescue. I was able to download many traditional songs used in the Jazz Funerals and set up the music in the backyard. It wasn't Bourbon Street, but I think she liked.
My friends came out of the proverbial woodwork to come and be with me and support me and my family during the party we hosted to bid a "Hail and Farewell" to mom. Without them and my wife, I doubt very much that I would have been worth a damn. Even members of the yacht club came to see her off. It really meant a lot. I hope they know just how much they mean to me.
And the sun rose the next day, just as it has for all time. I still have my moments where some trivial little thing or thought will have my throat caught, but it is because of the efforts and lessons of my mom that I am the success that I am today. My continuing success is the living testament to those who have gone before me and to her. I hope that when my time comes, I will have done right by the gifts given me and look back with pride and happiness and go to my ancestors with pride and peace.
How lucky was I to have a mom who touched so many people, and that was even remembered by one of my classmates and close friends more than 20 years after graduation?
Packing up her apartment and going through boxes of her memories held many bitter-sweet moments for my siblings and me. We found boxes containing photos of her as a baby and little girl, later a young woman and finally a mother. Letters and scrapbooks with all the "goings on" of the time. A folded newspaper front page from Shreveport, Louisiana, proclaiming that "GERMANY QUITS", the announcement of V-E Day.
Many personal treasures and mementos were there as well. It seemed she kept everything, even the letter I wrote to the Easter Bunny as a small child. The hard question, what to keep, what to let pass into the mists of history. One treasure my sister found was a letter written to me by my Great Grandfather the day I was born. I had never seen it until that day sitting on the floor slowly going through mom's things. Talk about goose bumps.
The packing took place over several days, my sister and I generally working 4-6 hours at a time with my brother helping to organize.
A strange blessing in all this was the time that I was able to have with both my sister and brother, whom we had not been together since my wedding, then only briefly, and before that, hardly since I graduated college. We resolved to make sure and spend more time together as a family, a tough thing with us on opposite sides of the country.
The three of us faced the challenges of making mom's final arrangements which were simple in nature. Mom was cremated and plans are underway to scatter her ashes at sea with the assistance of several of her dear friends and loved ones from the Del Rey Yacht Club where she worked more than 17 years. I think it only fitting that they are included in her final sending.
On Sunday, July 20th, we hosted an open house BBQ, food, and drink fest to celebrate mom's life. As for the "New Orleans Jazz Funeral" she wanted, iTunes came to the rescue. I was able to download many traditional songs used in the Jazz Funerals and set up the music in the backyard. It wasn't Bourbon Street, but I think she liked.
My friends came out of the proverbial woodwork to come and be with me and support me and my family during the party we hosted to bid a "Hail and Farewell" to mom. Without them and my wife, I doubt very much that I would have been worth a damn. Even members of the yacht club came to see her off. It really meant a lot. I hope they know just how much they mean to me.
And the sun rose the next day, just as it has for all time. I still have my moments where some trivial little thing or thought will have my throat caught, but it is because of the efforts and lessons of my mom that I am the success that I am today. My continuing success is the living testament to those who have gone before me and to her. I hope that when my time comes, I will have done right by the gifts given me and look back with pride and happiness and go to my ancestors with pride and peace.
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